On a Wing and a Prayer
by SharanMcQuack
Summary: Launchpad injures his arm fighting the Beagle Boys and can't fly for a few days.


**On a Wing and a Prayer**

By Sharan McQuack, Launchpad's wife.

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Based on a scan (in the inducks) of the story "Publicity Stunt", which I have NOT read since it has not been translated into English and I am hopelessly monolingual.

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After landing a cargo plane for Mr. McDuck, I ran into my much loved husband Launchpad and gave him a kiss and a hug. Launchpad kissed me right back, but only gave me half a hug- he used his left arm, but not his right. Only then did I notice Launchpad was holding his right arm funny.

"What's wrong with your arm?" I asked.

"Well...the Beagle Boys tried to rob Mr. McDee's Bin again...and me, Mr. McDee and Gizmoduck gave them whatfor..." Launchpad began. (1)

"The Beagle Boys hurt you?" I asked.

"It's not broken! I only pulled a muscle or tore a ligament or something... I just won't be able to use it for a few days. This means...I can't FLY for a few days." Launchpad said, sounding like the World had come to an end.

"It could be worse. If God forbid they broke it, you might not be able to use it for SIX MONTHS! Remember that the NEXT time you fight a bunch a bad guys, OK?" I said. (2)

"Go tell Mr. McDuck that I'm going to have to fill in for you for a few days. I'll meet you back here later. Would you like to come along with me while I'm filling in or would riding in a plane you can't fly make it worse?" I asked.

"Riding in a plane is better than nothing. I'll go tell Mr. McDuck." Launchpad replied.

HOWEVER, Mr. McDuck was planning to open a brand-new shopping mall and tear down the old shopping mall next door to it. Mr. McDuck wanted a LOT of notice and buzz about his new mall, but the public was bored to tears of shopping malls.

"I know! I'll arrange for a doozy of a publicity stunt! I'll get Launchpad to fake a "crash" into the old shopping mall, right into the old bank! He'll parachute out at the last second! As the old plane "crashes" into the old bank, a team will set off explosives, and the buildings will fall down as if he knocked down the bank and started off a chain reaction! If THAT doesn't get people talking about my new mall, nothing will.

So when Launchpad came in to explain his situation to Mr. McDuck, Mr. McDuck did not give Launchpad a chance to explain. Instead, he explained his idea to Launchpad, who TRIED to tell Mr. McDuck that he, Launchpad, could not fly a plane for a few days.

However, Mr. McDuck wouldn't listen. He went on explaining his plan to Launchpad, who again tried to tell Mr. McDuck about his bad arm, but Mr. McDuck thought Launchpad was holding out for more money. Which got Mr. McDuck to respect Launchpad more. Go figure.

Finally, Launchpad gave up. Nobody but nobody can out-stubborn Mr. McDuck, Lord love the old buzzard.

I was at the new shopping mall, to take photos of its grand opening for the Duckburg Daily News . That's the kind of "exciting" news free-lance photographers REALLY cover. But, boy, did I get some exciting photos!

I was surprised to hear Launchpad would be flying a plane towing an advertising sign for the new mall, but I somehow assumed his arm was feeling better. Maybe Mr. McDuck actually sprung for a chiropractor.

Well, Launchpad flew BEAUTIFULLY. He circled the new mall, he circled the old one, and he parachuted out just before "crashing", the explosives went off and the old mall went down one building at a time, starting from the old bank. One building seemingly knocking over the next like so many dominos.

Mr. McDuck then came to congratulate Launchpad and so did I. Then I noticed Launchpad was still holding his right arm funny.

"Your arm is still bothering you?" I asked, fearing he reinjured it.

"What's wrong with your arm?" asked Mr. McDuck, noticing the injury for the first time.

" I TRIED to tell you, Mr. McDuck , I hurt my arm and I can't use it…" Launchpad began.

"Then HOW?" chorused me and Mr. McDuck together.

"I flew the plane with one hand." Launchpad explained.

**The End.**

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(1) OK, I'll say it: in Disney's Ducktales TV special, the story "The thought message receiver" made Launchpad out to be a failure because he did not get Mr. McDuck money back after it had been stolen. (Little goody two shoes Webby did. Writers and artists at Disney apparently don't like Launchpad. Why do you assume we girls will like Webby just because she's a girl?)

Hello? **THAT'S NOT LAUNCHPAD'S JOB! IT'S ****NOT LAUNCHPAD'S MONEY! **It's not like LAUNCHPAD invented the stupid thought radio that led to the money being stolen in the first place!

And I didn't see anybody blaming Ugly Twerp who did invent silly thing or ask him to get the money back! Not Mr. how-does-this-clown-rate! Nobody jumps down HIS throat!

How does TRYING to help a friend make Launchpad a failure?

(2) So I worry about my Launchpad. So sue me.


End file.
